No, the beginning of a relationship for me always feels like waiting for the other shoe to drop.
I’ve been dating since I was 17, so for the better part of a decade.
Sometimes things just don’t work out, whether it’s because of timing, distance, or the fact that not everyone is going to like everyone else.
And, given the number of people I’ve dated and will probably date in the future, there’s likely a greater chance of things working out on any given first date than there is of that person being my soulmate — and that’s totally fine. So I’m trying to have more fun with the process and stop taking things so seriously.
And I’ve only spent about three of those years in “serious” relationships, which I define as “we call each other boyfriend and girlfriend, you’ve met my parents, and we’ve gotten into at least two huge fights that didn’t end in a breakup.” The other seven-ish have been spent single, bobbing between different levels of non-relationships.
So it’s natural that someone like me can become cynical and untrusting when it comes to relationships.“If you can’t do that, you might have to give yourself some time to heal.” So that’s what I’ve been trying to do.I haven’t completely shut myself off to dating, but I am taking a lot more time to try to get a sense of a person before I take the time to meet them IRL.“If you go in with that attitude, the date will never be a total bust,” Sussman says.If anything, it will be a hilarious story to share with your friends over a cocktail.